Thursday, April 7, 2011

In His Hands

It's been a long, long week.  One of those weeks that you fear will never end, and it's not even over yet!

Work has been very busy.  Next week is Volunteer Appreciation Week and our big Volunteer Banquet.  All of the other events I help with are someone else's and I don't feel too much pressure about them, but this one is my responsibility and it's sort of scary.  Of all weeks to have to work four days, this was a good one.  I had a lot of little things to get done.  

I really do enjoy this part of my work.  I love coming up with unique decorations and planning fun ways of recognizing the volunteers to make them feel special.  The act of dreaming something up and then creating it, really makes me feel alive and fulfilled.  I am excited to see how it all goes, but tonight, I am completely and utterly exhausted and so thankful that I don't have to go back until Tuesday.  I am so relieved that tomorrow is a Mommy and Monroe day.  I'm also so glad that we've been sticking to our cleaning schedule and tomorrow won't be a day of intense cleaning. 

I've got to be honest, I've been struggling recently.  I sometimes daydream about what it would be like to not have to work.  More than sometimes...I think about it a lot.  I find myself getting really envious and jealous of my friends that can stay home with their kiddos, especially when they talk about the fun things they are doing and the places they are going.  I just have to keep telling myself that this is how things are for now.  That it won't always be this way.  I know that God is leading our lives and He has our best interest in mind.  I see His miracles every day and I know His plan is so much better than mine.  Sometimes it's hard though...and I feel petty and childish for feeling the way I do.   I do know how lucky I am.  I see my amazing husband and the way we connect.  I see my sweet little girlie and my growing belly and I know He's got the whole world in His hands:)  I've just got to focus on those things.  Those are the things that count!

I heard some really great news today!  My secretary, Terri, said she heard it was supposed to be in the 80's this weekend.  Doesn't that sound just perfect?!  I think we all could use a little light therapy.  It will be great to open up all the windows and hang out outside.  Living in Chicago, definitely makes you more grateful for Spring and Summer.  It was so fun dressing Monroe in little shorts and sun dresses.  I can tell that she really liked it too.  She is a definitely a Floridian at heart.  Here are a few more pics of Rosie and Colton, loving their Florida time.  I stole them from Tasha's FB page.

 Loving a good slide.  This is an outfit that Auntie Mellie got for Monroe last year.  I LOVE it!  It's extra special because it says, "Rosie's" on it.  Thanks, Mel!!!
Eating a leisurely breakfast and poking each other.  You really wouldn't have believed how much fun these two had.  

No news to report on the baby bump, other than the fact that it's definitely made it's debut.  It all happened kind of quickly.  On Monday, it was a tiny bit visible and yesterday, I couldn't button my pants.   I fear that this kid is going to be huge.  

I wasn't able to get confirmation from the doc yesterday on the gender because my schedule wouldn't allow for me to get over there.  Next Wednesday is my appointment and hopefully we will know, once and for all, what this little person is.  In my heart, I know it's a boy.   I truly love this little rolypoly man.  He's super active and I can't wait to see what he's like when he's out here with us.  

Have I mentioned that I really love my doctor?  He is a super great guy and doctor.  He's also beyond intelligent (despite the unfortunate spelling of male anatomy:)  Mark and I both feel very comfortable with him and I think the transition from Midwife/NP to MD, will be a smooth one.  I have at least two coworkers that plan on going to him from all the good stuff I've told them. 

I better put this away and spend some quality time with my main squeeze.  Hope you are all having a great week.   The weekend is almost here!


Mellie said...

Hey Steph,

It's been a long week over here too. I think part of it has to do with coming back from a wonderful vacation and visiting the people we love. After coming back, I too have been struggling with the fact that I have to work right now, even if it is part-time. So thank you for posting this as it's nice to know that someone else is sharing these thoughts and to have the reminder that it is in His hands!

Also, thanks for posting the picture of Monroe in her "Rosie's" outfit. I'm so glad it fits and she was able to wear it in the warm Florida weather, no less. It's just too bad I wasn't able to stick around to see it. She looks so cute in it and is growing way too fast. Can't wait to meet Murrill baby #2!


Hanne Noel said...

lady, i can totally relate to your SAHM envy. at times, it has completely consumed me. i think only in the last year, have i learned to let it go, and just accept that its more than likely not in my cards. not to say that doesn't still sting at times. that is one of the main reasons i don't plan on having more children. it is just to painful for me to leave them, and work, especially when they are babies. and then i am pretty worthless at work too. its my vice. for sure. hard to give 100% on the job, when you want to be 100% at home, raising those beauties.

my mother always tells me when i am moaning about it that i should tell God that i am frustrated and sad. just like i tell her. He wants to know our hearts. and strengthen them.

you are a wonderful mom. :) enjoy growing a boy. its fun to keep up with all these tummies on facebook, and blogs etc. <> thanks for allowing me to snoop into your life. HAPPY ALMOST SABBATH!